Showing posts with label schlonged. Show all posts
Showing posts with label schlonged. Show all posts

Thursday, December 31, 2015

Can Trump���������s Clinton-Sex-Scandal Revival Hurt Hillary?

nymag.com

This week Donald Trump pulled off yet another remarkable political feat: While several of his rivals have tried and failedto turn Bill Clinton's decades-old sex scandals into a 2016 campaign issue, Trump is actually making it happen. After his complaint about Hillary calling him "ISIS's best recruiter" morphed into adebate about sexism just before Christmas, Trump changed the conversation again, tweeting on Monday "If Hillary thinks she can unleash her husband, with his terrible record of women abuse, while playing the women's card on me, she's wrong!" Tuesday on theToday show, he added, "there certainly were a lot of abuse of women, you look at whether it's Monica Lewinsky or Paula Jones, or any of them, and that certainly will be fair game."

Now with the former president set to begin campaigning for his wife in New Hampshire on Monday, other Republican candidates, including Carly Fiorina and Ben Carson, are joining in the discussion of Clinton's past sexual improprieties. The question now is whether their attacks on Bill Clinton can damage his wife's campaign, while years ago they only boosted the first lady's popularity.

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As the New York Times notes, in some ways Trump is "an imperfect messenger on the issue of fidelity," considering that his marital issues were documented in the tabloids for many years, and he was onceaccused of marital rape (Ivana Trump subsequently walked back her claim). And aside from his own spotty marital history, Trump has a long history of attempting to curry favor with the Clintons and dismissing the allegations against the former president. Over the years, Trump invited the Clintons to his wedding, donated to their foundation, called Bill his favorite president, and declared Hillary would be a "great president or vice-president."

He also defended the president against the "moralists" and hypocrites pursuing the Lewinsky scandal many times, saying Clinton would have been "everybody's hero" if he'd cheated with a supermodel, and "if the Clinton affair proves anything it is that the American people don’t care about the private lives and personal of our political leaders so long as they are doing the job."

While pulling a 180 on the Clintons might destroy another candidate, Trump is spinning his reversal as more proof of his business acumen. "As a world-class businessman, you have to get along with everybody," Trump toldreporters on Tuesday. "I was able to get along with Clinton, I was able to get along with virtually every politician you can imagine ... When I went to Washington and I needed something, I got it." And of course, his willingness to accuse the former president of abusing women even as CNN's Don Lemon shut down a conservative commentator for making that same point reinforces the idea that Trump is willing to speak his mind.

Still, some Clinton supporters insist that Trump's focus on old sexual-misconduct allegations will only hurt Trump. "Why would he even bring Bill up? What good would that do? That’s not what America is really worried about right now," Bob Withington, who came to hear Hillary Clinton speak in New Hampshire on Tuesday, told the Boston Herald. "I don’t think people in this country are going to pay attention to that one bit."

Writing in the Hill, former Democratic congressional aide Brent Budowsky argued that taking on one of the greatest living politicians isn't a very smart move on Trump's part. "My advice to Trump, which he will regret not taking, is don't mess with Bill Clinton, who will bury him with a wink of his eye and a smile on his face," he said.

But this week, Washington Post columnist Ruth Marcus said that while it may be hard for Clinton supporters to admit, "in the larger scheme of things, Bill Clinton’s conduct toward women is far worse than any of the offensive things that Trump has said." She continued:

Which leads to the next question: What is the relevance of Bill Clinton’s conduct for Hillary Clinton’s campaign? Ordinarily, I would argue that the sins of the husband should not be visited on the wife. What Bill Clinton did counts against him, not her, and I would include in that her decision to stick with him. What happens inside a marriage is the couple’s business, and no one else’s, even when both halves crave the presidency.

But Hillary Clinton has made two moves that lead me, gulp, to agree with Trump on the “fair game” front. She is (smartly) using her husband as a campaign surrogate, and simultaneously (correctly) calling Trump sexist.


Wall Street Journal opinion piece echoed her point, saying President Clinton "was a genuine sexual harasser in the classic definition of exploiting his power as a workplace superior, and the Clinton entourage worked hard to smear and discredit his many women accusers." It goes on to recount how Clinton adviser Sidney Blumenthal, who remains a friend of the couple, smeared Monica Lewinsky, and says this reflects on the "standards that would prevail in another Clinton Presidency."

So far the Clintons have remained mostlysilent on the new round of accusations, but with Trump vowing to keep up his counterattacks, we'll soon see if the Clinton sex scandals are a serious campaign liability, or just a holiday distraction. "She's got a major problem, it happens to be right in her house," Trump said of Hillary's sexism allegations on Tuesday. "If she wants to do that we're going to go right after the president, the ex-president, and we'll see how it all comes out."

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Thursday, December 24, 2015

The Nuclear Option: Donald Trump Schools Rivals on ‘The Art of the Schlong’

by CHARLES HURT23 Dec 2015716

If you think “The Art of the Deal” was a yuuuuuuuuuuge success — and it was — just wait until Donald Trump comes out with his latest masterpiece, “The Art of the Schlong.”

In “The Art of the Deal,” the real estate mogul tutors budding young mogul wannabes on how to make deals so that they, too, can build giant glass skyscrapers emblazoned with their names in gold.

“The Art of the Schlong” is a political treatise, like “The Art of War,” only more devastating and infinitely more entertaining. It is more psychologically sinister than Machiavelli’s “The Prince.” It is like Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” only the opposite. Except for the influence part.

The treatise is a tactical primer for anybody thinking of getting into politics, especially as a Republican these days. Tough world out there right now.

It is a schlong or get-schlonged world, so you’d better learn how to schlong.

One of the early chapters is titled “Why Jeb! Doesn’t Deserve an Exclamation Point.”

It is about the vaunted scion of a political dynasty with an immaculate pedigree who waltzed onto the political stage with trunks full of money other people gave him. The political scion was going to be the next Republican presidential nominee and would kneel to reward illegal aliens for acts of love and all would be right in the world again. And he would launch World War III, in all probability.

He went out and got himself some German-looking glasses, shed all the tubbiness he had gained and basked in the glow of front-runner.

America was less enthusiastic but, you know, whatever. Mr. Trump, instinctively understanding Americans’ low enthusiasm for the candidate they had been served, sized up the scion and instantly declared him “low energy.”

It is true that these dangerous diets can wreck a person’s energy level and slow the thinking. But Mr. Trump’s evaluation was clearly about so much more than the diet. It was how voters felt about the man. And, most important, it was a carnal assessment about the man’s ability — inability, really — to perform.

It was savage and devastating.

Another chapter is titled “Ain’t Brain Surgery: Saving Children’s Lives Won’t Spare You.”

It tells the story of a pediatric brain surgeon who performed miraculous feats to save children’s lives. He emerged from the worst poverty and social circumstances to become one of the kindest, sweetest, most decent men alive. And, basically, how he really didn’t belong in politics.

Just as the brain surgeon was gathering a real head of steam, Mr. Trump declared him “pathological” for all his past talk about his inability to control his temper as an angry teenager.

Game, set, match. Brain surgeon gone.

As genius as “The Art of the Schlong” is from page one, it doesn’t quite reach its complete and blinding brilliance until Mr. Trump gets into the general election campaign against the Joan of Arc character, who — spoiler alert! — winds up getting horribly schlonged after suffering a stunning and humiliating public schlonging eight years earlier.

But because Mr. Trump operates at a level of psychological sophistication so far above this modern world of dummy politicians, none of the politicos gets that Mr. Trump wasn’t even talking about the man who beat Joan at the polls.

He was actually talking about how Joan had been so horribly schlonged by her very own betrothed husband, who was a politician before her and has been her only meal ticket for her entire career.

It was during the primary in South Carolina in 2008 when Joan’s husband — gifted politician — became unhinged and started invoking racial undertones in a campaign against America’s real First Black President. Everyone marveled that he would have so openly sabotaged his own wife’s presidential campaign.

But, truth is, it wasn’t the first time he had publicly schlonged her in such a humiliating way.

You see, Joan’s husband has always been like a bull elephant in musth, with reproductive hormones leaking from his temples, charging at females of every size, shape and age. Females who know the couple tell their daughters to stay away.

And, so, now, thanks to Mr. Trump’s treatise, Joan of Arc will never again be pictured in the mind’s eye of the American voter except as the bride of the most unrestrained public schlonger of our time.

Charles Hurt can be reached at charleshurt@live.com and on Twitter via@charleshurt.

Read More Stories About:

2016 Presidential RaceDonald Trump,Hillary Clinton

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Trump Calls Hillary’s Bathroom Break ‘Disgusting,’ Says She ‘Got Schlonged’ by Obama in ’08


by Elizabeth Preza | 11:04 pm, December 21st, 2015

VIDEO

 

 

 

 

At a Michigan rally Monday, Republican frontrunner Donald Trump said it was “too disgusting” to talk about why Hillary Clinton vanished during Saturday’s Democratic Debate, and later said the Democratic frontrunner was “schlonged” by President Barack Obama in 2008.

“What happened to her? I’m watching the debate and she disappeared. Where did she go?” Trump asked, later adding he thought “she quit.”

Clinton was a minute or so late returning to the main stage during the debate in New Hampshire, reportedly due to a bathroom break. She walked to the podium with a simple “sorry,” garnering applause and laughter from the audience.

“I thought she gave up,” Trump restated. “They had to start the debate without her.”

“I know where she went, It’s disgusting,” Trump continued while the rally audience cheered. “I don’t want to talk about it. It’s too disgusting.”

Later, Trump expanded on his attack, launching into a vulgar retelling of Clinton’s 2008 defeat by Obama. “She was going to beat [Obama,] she was favored to win, and she got schlonged,” Trump said. “She lost, I mean she lost.’

Urban dictionary defines: 

schlonged

To be cockslapped by a man with a large penis.
'Shit that teenage mum just got schlonged by that hobo!'

by Maximus Aurelius May 28, 2009Watch the video above, via CNN.

[Image via screengrab]


>> Follow Elizabeth Preza on Twitter (@lizacisms)

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barack obamaDonald TrumpHillary Clinton